Rating: PG-13 and R
Summary: It's 1975 and Micky Dolenz is divorced and living the party life. Rita is a young woman on the L.A. scene. When the two meet, their lives are forever changed...
Warnings: Implied Sexual Content (Het)
Notes: The title of the story is from a song by Tori Amos called "Playboy Mommy," in case any were wondering. There may be some historical inaccuracies in this work of fiction in either general, or in Micky Dolenz history. I apologize for them.
Many months had past since those first days of my live-in relationship with Micky. I was four months along in my pregnancy and was showing, the obvious need for new clothes apparent. But all in all I was content- the morning sickness had subsided and Micky and I had grown on each other, becoming more intimate with the passing days. It was all I could have hoped and dreamed for.
The sun beat down its warmth on me as I lay floating in my bikini on the water of the pool. The world around me was quiet and I began to drift off. And there she was again- the angelic child named Hannah. She was running towards me in a field of wildflowers, smiling gleefully, arms outstretched. Than, she fell; I ran to her to find this young child cut and bruised, dripping with blood. Picking her up, I knew she was gone. I cried to the heavens in anguish, the blood seeping into my clothes. And then that male voice of before called my name…
I was suddenly woken by a splash and movement in the pool. I opened my eyes and let my body sink, dunking my head under to rid myself of the horribly all too real nightmare. Micky swam over to me, a mischievous grin lining his face, “Were you asleep?”
“Yeah,” I replied putting my arms around his neck when he reached me, “It doesn’t matter, I dreamt of something awful.”
“Oh well, let me make it all better,” Micky said pulling me to him. I instinctively wrapped my legs around his like a child might, kissing him passionately as I moved the wet hair from his eyes. He put his arms around my back, hands caressing me and I could feel heat between us even in the cool water as the kisses went deeper and deeper.
Suddenly, I heard a car engine at the road and the gate opening slowly. I broke away as Micky kissed my neck, “Who’s that?”
“Huh?” Micky questioned still pecking me, seemingly oblivious. He steadied his breathing, looking over the pool’s edge. Abruptly, he let me go, “Oh I forgot. Come on, get out.” He began to swim to get out of the pool.
I wiped my face with water, knowing it was red with blush, slowly moving after him, “What’s going on?”
“Samantha is here with Ami,” he said as we stepped out. He looked back at me, “You’d better put something on.” I was going to ask what I should wear, but Micky disappeared into the house. Quickly, I grabbed my towel and dried my hair best as I could, than wrapped it around myself as I walked inside and straight upstairs. Once I hit the hallway, I sprinted into the bedroom.
I shut the door behind me and went to my bag for clean clothes. What I found, and thought was clean, were a pair of jeans and a large Beatles t-shirt. I slipped them on over my bathing suit, found my sandals and than went to the mirror where I brushed my hair out thoroughly. The finishing touch was a bit of lip gloss and eyeliner; I thought I looked half decent anyway. I went to the hallway, shut the door behind me to disguise the messy room, and walked slowly down the stairs.
Micky was standing in the living room, robe on, talking to a tall blonde model type which I assumed was Samantha; she nearly made me feel inferior, in all her lightness and beauty. A small girl was sitting on the carpet petting the cat; that must have been Ami. Halfway down the stairs, what felt like a block of lead settled in my stomach. I felt like an outsider, an audience member observing a movie. But I swallowed my nerves, and strode the rest of the way down, just as Micky noticed me.
He pulled me in close and motioned toward Samantha, “Rita, this is Samantha. Sammy, this is Rita; we’ve been seeing each other for a few months.” It was apparent to me at that moment that Micky had not told Samantha who I was and how much of each other Micky and I had seen. I tried to keep my composure as she extended her hand.
“Hello Rita, lovely to meet you,” Samantha said genuinely.
“You too,” was all I could muster to say. I was damn near a wreck! I was the Trojan horse, the best kept secret. And gosh was she ever pretty; Samantha’s blonde hair cascaded down her back, her eyes shined and she matched immaculately. And there I was with wet, straight hair and some clothes I threw on. But Micky reassured me with a light squeeze.
He then knelt down to Ami’s level, “Hey darling, you want to go swimming today? Daddy will take you.” Ami looked up at him with glee and smiled big, she nodded furiously and than looked to her mom for approval.
Samantha handed Micky a small over-night bag, “She has a bathing suit in there. Just be careful.”
“Will do. Come on honey, let’s play!” he looked Ami by the hand and began to walk away, and than turned back, “You coming Rita?”
“Oh no, count me out of this one,” I replied putting my hands up, “I’ll come out and watch.” How dare I impede on Micky’s precious time with his daughter? The two of them sped outside as I followed slowly. To my surprise, it seemed Samantha was also staying a few minutes because she tagged along. We sat next to each other on some lawn chairs on the right side of the pool, in the shade.
“So how did you two meet then?” Samantha asked once we were both comfortably sitting, and Micky and Ami safely in the pool.
“Um, a party Harry Nilsson threw in the summer,” I replied finding it hard to make eye contact with her, “We just really clicked.” I could have slapped myself- what had I just said? Clicked?! Yeah, in more ways than one.
“He does have a magnetic personality,” was Samantha’s response as she looked out to the pool with a slight smile. I followed her gaze; Micky was floating in the pool with Ami on his shoulders. He’s than let her fall forward and catch her; she was loving every minute of it, laughing and swimming away. I sat up straighter in my chair, observing the two. It took a few moments before I realized Samantha was staring at me. She opened her mouth and the voice that came out was shaky, “You’re not… you’re pregnant!”
I looked down and noticed my stomach was visible in my knees-up position. Damn, I’d given myself away. Well, better for her to find out through her own devices anyway…
“Yes I am,” I muttered softly, now holding her shocked look.
“Is it…” she questioned, “Is it Micky’s?” I nodded finally looking away. This moment always brought me shame and I didn’t know why.
“It just happened,” I began, but Samantha put up her hands and shook her head.
“It’s really none of my business. Anyway, what Micky does no longer has anything to do with me. It’s just a bit shocking is all!”
“You’re telling me!” I said laughing nervously.
Samantha rubbed her cheek, than looked out at father and daughter again, “Well, I am proud he’s taken responsibility.”
“I love him,” I blurted. Suddenly, I felt emotional and could feel tears in my eyes. I tried to dab them away with my hand.
Samantha smiled and leaned over, touching my hand, “It’s ok.”
Just then, Ami came bounding over in her pink swimsuit, a huge grin on her face, “Mommy, did you see me in the water?”
“Yes dear, you’re doing so well at swimming,” Samantha replied hugging her daughter.
Micky approached us, dripping wet and sat on the edge of my chair. He looked at me and touched my leg, “You ok?”
I nodded, “Fine.”
Samantha stayed a bit longer still, wrapping Ami in a warm towel and holding her as the little girl drifted to sleep. She and Micky chatted about things pertaining to their now separate lives as I looked on. It suddenly became evident to me how well they got alone, and yet how heartbroken every word from Micky’s mouth sounded. That explains his party animal lifestyle. I wondered how he was truly coping; a twinge of anxiety in my stomach. I attempted to brush it off as they stood, Samantha carefully handed Ami to Micky and said goodbye. I got up to do the same and out of the blue felt very dizzy and disoriented. I tried to forget it as I hugged Samantha goodbye and we walked to her car.
A few feet before we got there is when it happened- I was falling in slow motion and landed on the pavement with a loud thud, mostly on my side. I blinked and all was hazy, “Micky? I called weakly for him.
“Oh my god Rita, what is it?!” he asked frantically coming to my side, terror in his voice.
“I don’t knowl...” I mumbled. I could feel my energy leaving me and than Samantha’s presence on my other side; Micky must have set Ami down, though I couldn’t be sure.
“Good god, Micky she’s bleeding! Run quick, get some towels and call an ambulance!” I heard Samantha yell. And I knew what it was- my womb had seemed very still as of late. It was the baby.
“My baby… the baby,” I cried hysterically as I tried to get up but couldn’t.
Samantha appeared over me, “Rita, stay with me. Rita? Rita!” Everything went black.